Wednesday, May 23, 2012

You Know You're a Preschool Teacher When

You reach into the box to get a new tissue, and pull out one that is partly used.
You come home with blue fingernails because the food coloring spilled.
You come home with red fingernails because the water colors spilled.
You come home with glue all over your fingers because someone squished the top back on the glue stick without rolling it down.
You find yourself using "We" when you talk to your class (“We all need to catch a bubble, we keep our hands to ourselves, we use walking feet, etc…..”).
You come home from work with smears on your shoulder from the child who cried on it that morning.
You keep losing your pen only to find 5 stuck in your bun.
You hair started out cute at the beginning of the day then transformed to a messy pen filled pony tail.
You have ever uttered the phrase "We do not call our friends pickles, Baby Diaper, or tell our friends they can't come to you Birthday."
You see at least 2 bottoms per day. Either running to the bathroom or nonchalantly hanging out with a hand or 2 upon it. 
You pull out toilet paper tubes out of the trash because you know you will need them in class.
You have at least one piece of light-up, holiday, character, sea.sonal jewelry.
You come home at the end of the day with only your midsection smeered with dirty hands, markers, and paint.
You find yourself humming Tootie Tah, Days of the Week, Skinamarinki Dinki Dink
You find glitter in your hair, stuck to your skin, in the bottom of your bag, in the upholstery of your car, in every article of clothing you own, in the carpets at your house...basically everywhere you've ever been! And no matter how many times you shower you are still covered in glitter!
When leaving the room to use the restroom, you tell people that you need to use the potty.
At the store, you dig in your pocket for change and pull out beads, legos and a marble.
You tie your shoes in double knots.
You have clothing for every season.
You know that the last puzzle piece is hidden under the rug or shelf.

You can name 5 techniques for unjamming a zipper.
You carry extra tissues and hand sanatizer wherever you go. 
You can continue reading your story with a straight face midst toots and giggles.
You have an extra set of clothes for emergencies. 
You can read an entire book upside down while showing all pictures.
You go to to the store and realize you are still wearing a fruit loop necklace that was made for you earlier that day.
You find stickers in very interesting places.
You can hear 25 voices behind you and know exactly which one belongs to the child out of line.
You get a secret thrill out of laminating something.
You know each child's individual sneeze, cough, and other strange noises they make
You walk into a store and hear the words "It's Ms/Mr._______" and know you have been spotted. And then the child won't even look at you because they are freaking out that you have actually LEFT THE SCHOOL!
You have 25 people that accidentally call you Mom/Dad at one time or another.
You can eat a multi-course meal in under twenty minutes.
You've trained yourself to go to the bathroom at two distinct times of the day: lunch and planning period.
You start saving other people's trash, because most likely, you can use that coffee can or plastic butter tub for something in the classroom.
You believe chocolate is a food group.
You can tell if it's a full moon without ever looking outside.
You believe that unspeakable evils will befall you if anyone says "Boy, the kids sure are mellow today."
You feel the urge to talk to strange children and correct their behavior when you are out in public.
You spend more money on school stuff than you do on your own needs.
You can't pass the school supply aisle without getting at least five items!
You ask your friends if the left hand turn he just made was a "good choice or a bad choice."
You find true beauty in a can of perfectly sharpened pencils
You are secretly addicted to hand sanitizer or as we call it magic soap.
You choose the scent of tempra paint over victorias secret "angel" any day
You know all seven verses to "I'm Bringing Home a Baby Bumble Bee" because you made three of them up yourself
You can make paper chains with a perfect pattern in your sleep
Everywhere you go they find you with the children

You go home with rubber bands on your wrists.
You are in the grocery store and tell a child who is running to show you their walking feet
You have mulch lining the cuffs of your pants.

I can't think of anymore 

Anyone got anything to add

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