Tuesday, June 26, 2012

Nothing Compares To You


I have always been kind of out there (some people might say weird) I like to think of myself as an individual. Some people might not like the same things I like and other people may not understand me and I am 100% ok with that. I like being me, but sometimes i have a hard time not comparing myself to other people.

So and so's house is never a mess when we are there. My house is so messy today even though I just swept and mopped yesterday (thanks a lot dogs)

So and so got in shape so quick. Ugh why can't I get off of my lazy butt and workout.

I think this might  be the curse of the woman. On the outside we have it all together, but on the inside we are comparing every little thing to the way someone else does it.

I know everyone is different and I really want to teach this to Mckinley. I want her to be an individual. I don't want her to be like anyone else or do anything like anyone else. I think I will be ok if she is a little different or perhaps weird.


As I watch her crawl into a basket and act like it is the greatest thing since spray butter I don't think I am going to have to work to hard at all of this, but I still want to be conscious about the things I say and the way I talk about myself in front of her. I want her to know I am happy with myself and my life and I don't want to be like anyone else.

“Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.” 
― Oscar Wilde

I think I want to find a print that says this to hang in our house. A little daily reminder that it would be no fun if we were all the same.

Monday, June 25, 2012

In Treatment

Mom's first treatment was July 21. She had been waiting what felt like and eternity for them to confirm her second biopsy results (these were for the trial study developing a vaccine for cancer). Finally she decided screw the trial I want to get things started. So we emailed the nurse and said she was ready and to move forward with whatever came next. Fast forward to the next day. Around noonish my sister called to tell me they had called that morning and they had finally gotten her results back and she was a trial candidate and she would start chemo THAT DAY. Praise the Lord something was finally happening.

Now this all feels really real. I know it should already feel real, but it has all happened so fast and yet so slow. Am I making any sense? Try and keep up with my brain. 

They didn't get to finish her treatment Thursday so she needed to go back Friday and I got to pick her up after she was done. They gave her 2 medicines the first day, and the third one the second day. She is such a  trooper for sitting still that long because if you know my mom you know sitting still is not easy for her. I think that is the toughest part of her treatment for me is her not being able to get up and go, but I know she will be back to herself in no time.

Cancer is such a weird disease because the cancer doesn't make you feel sick usually, the medicine to get rid of the cancer makes you sick. Stupid cancer.

Mom has done amazing these past few days after her first round. She has had some symptoms from being extremely fatigued, strong flu like symptoms, body ache, and just feeling off and I know she is being strong for us because she is a hard ass. She is such a bad patient though because she can't be still, but I think that is actually helping her feel a little better. Getting up and showering and moving around seems to get her juices pumping and get her appetite going a little.

I feel like I am going to start making her crazy soon. I am like and overbearing stage mom asking her every 5 seconds if she is ok or if she needs anything. She is going to start asking me to drop the baby off and leave because I am making her nuts.

I have been researching different things she can take with her during her treatments and things that could help her side affects. It is weird to say I have been pinning stuff on my Pinterest, but I don't want to forget them. I thought about making a Cancer Sucks! board, but thought that might be a little weird for everyone who follows me to see "Roxanne Pinned such and such to Cancer Sucks!" That might be kind of a downer. I found a ton of great ideas from socks and gloves, to lemon drops, to fun things to celebrate the milestones. I think the most amazing thing I found on the internet was a community of people who don't even know my mom, but are praying for her everyday.

The most incredible connection I have made came from a picture on Pinterest that sparked an idea for a laundry room redo. I found This picture and posted a message on the blog asking if it was ok to use this picture as my inspiration for my redo. I never expected a reply because this post was from 2011. Imagine my surprise when I received and email back from Cindy at Cameras and Chaos saying she would love to see   it when I was finished.

Of course I am a blog whore (not a nice term, but it fits) and when I find a blog I like I add it to my blog list and I love going back and reading past posts. I am on a redo kick at Le Casa Team D and let me tell you I have found a TON of inspiration on this blog.

So fast forward to more blog reading and I come across a post all about how she makes quilts and gives them to people going through chemotherapy treatments and that just hit home with me. Ever since having Mckinley I am a crier and I have never really been a crier and now with everything going on I am a crier times 1000 so of course I am crying reading her post and I leave her a message about how awesome she is. Wouldn't you know she is sending my mama her very own quilt. Shhhh she doesn't know and I am hoping she doesn't read this until I give it to her. Do you think she might be a little bit surprised? I can't wait to take some picture of her all snuggled up in it. Que more crying when I got that email. I can't even watch a Baby Story anymore because I am a sobbing hormonal mess everytime!

It makes me sad that something like cancer brings people together because no one should have to go through this, but then it makes me happy to know this is bringing people together. I keep telling my mom she has a ton of people she has never even met out there praying for her.

It is still so weird to be writing about cancer and everything going on, but reading other people's experiences with it especially the people in the family of someone going through all of this has been really helpful to me so maybe I can be helpful to someone else.

Thankfully we have the BEST medicine for every ailment.
Mrs. Sassy Pants! I wish we could bottle her up as the cure all for everything!

Another good medicine will be a week at the beach. I think we all need a mental break from reality for a while. 

Sunday, June 24, 2012

Summertime and The Livin Is Easy

This weeks photo challenge at The Paper Mama is Summertime.
So far our summer has been spent in our baby pool or in my parent's pool keeping my mama busy.

The Paper Mama Photo Challenge

Thursday, June 21, 2012

Check

I made a smallish list last night of things I need to get done before Mckinley's birthday July 27 and big pat on the back I have already completed 1 task.








Scrap Fabric Birthday Banner Complete!

I have already checked 2 things off of my long list of To Do's. I purchased the straws last night from      Sweet Estelle on Etsy (Facebook). She was super duper easy to work with and super sweet. I highly recommend checking out her shop and if you need paper straws she is the lady to see.



Now I need a little lady to take a nap so I can shower and then we can  check a few more items off of our list

Birthday fabric scrap banner
Birthday crown
Trial run of smash cake
Trial run of rainbow whoopee pies
Finish month banner
Food plates
Cake plates
silverware
Paper Straws
Cups
Small cups for dip and veggies/fruit
paper flowers
Pictures for invitations
Order Invitations
Send Invitations
Smash cake monogrammed shirt, bib, and bloomers


Paint laundry room
Laundry room shelves
shelf behind couch
Bathroom prints
Frames for prints
Map prints
Frame for map prints

Update: I checked off 3 more things today. I found the plates, napkins, cups, and silverware at the dollar store today. I ended up with a few extra sets because I didn't know you couldn't return stuff so it looks like my no paper products used in the house will be thrown out of the window for a week or 2. Thankfully they only cost $1 a piece and we might need extras for the party. Either way they will get used.

Update of an update: I found a pre made felt crown at Hobby Lobby that was the perfect exact color I was already making Mckinley's crown in so I snatched it up for $4!!!!!!!!! and whipped up the cutest first birthday crown last night (I might still be a little high from the fabric glue. I slept REALLY good last night too). I also scooped up a set of pre made tissue paper flowers. I know they are really easy to make, but I am going for ease right now.

I should have another update this evening because we are having our pictures taken by the lovely Courtney Young. I am hoping if I can ask her nicely and maybe bribe her with hugs and future photo sessions she will let me sneak a peak at the pictures next week so I can send the file off to Kristi at Best Impressions Paperie where I found the most PERFECT birthday invitation. Kristi has already been a dream to work with and I haven't even purchased the invitation yet. I love that the invitation is customizable and I love that I can purchase the file and print however many I need. Anywhere else you would have to decided you need X amount of  invites to order them and heaven forbid you need an extra one (I have run into this problem with Christmas cards and birth announcements.) So if you need any super cute Birthday invitations or anything paper related you have to check her Etsy store out. Check them out on  Best Impressions Paperie Facebook also.

Wednesday, June 20, 2012

Doody

I just finished typing up a post and went back to my blog to see if there were any new posts from any of my favorite blogs and I couldn't believe my eyes when I saw a new post from The Awesome Cloth Diaper Blog! 
It has been a while and we have missed you, but I forgive you and you have made it up to me with a giveaway!

I always tell Brent you can never have too many wet bags and the bags from Heavy Doody are super cute!
I really like the Medium White Dino Wet Bag.



 I know I usually dress Mckinley in all pink, but I have a thing for Dinosaurs and everything we own doesn't have to be girly!

SO I filled out the giveaway entries and we shall see if we get lucky.

Thanks for offering the giveaway!

Summer Projects

I have been scouring Pinterest for a few inspirations for our tiny house and I am now ready to make a few of my ideas come to life. I have become obsessed with the color blue recently and I have NEVER really been a fan of light blue. Navy blue yes. Light blue NO. 

My daddy was juts here yesterday measuring my poor, sad, tiny laundry room for some storage shelves (storage is crucial in this house) and while he was measuring I was thinking about what else I could do in there to liven it up. I know when you are selling a blank canvas is crucial, but we will be in this house for a while and while I am here I NEED COLOR! 

My kitchen is already a cheery color green. Our office is a brick red. Our living room has a brown accent wall. And our bedroom is a golden color, but I want MORE! I want This and I am getting it because tonight I told Brent my idea and like he always does without hesitation he said "Make it happen"!

Have I told you how much I love my husband? From cloth diapers to composting and veggie gardens my husband is always supportive of every crazy idea I throw out. Don't forget he used one of his few vetoes on chickens.

I have a few more smaller ideas I want to do to freshen up our little homestead. I found these printables 1, 2, and 3 for our bathroom. It needs a splash of color and I think these in some mismatched frames will liven it up a bit.

And last, but not least I am planning a little belated Father's Day gift for Brent. I am not sure how often he actually looks at my blog, but if he does that's ok. Sadly we don't get to travel too much, but we have been to a few pretty cool places and I think This would be a neat way to start my wall-o-stuff in our den. Speaking of our den when we start building the shelves in our laundry room I will be staining a board and adding it behind our couch to add some  depth and adventure. I don't have too many places to show off the few nick knacks I own and I would like a neat lamp for our den (I am a vampire and hate overhead lights and spend most if not all of my day in the dark while I am inside.

I am going to try to paint the laundry room next week because we will be traveling the next week (I will do a little update about traveling with cloth when we get back). and I want to be ready for shelves plus I have a ton of Birthday Party stuff to get done before the big day. Yikes I need to make a list of things to get done or finish

Birthday fabric scrap banner
Birthday crown
Trial run of smash cake
Trial run of rainbow whoopee pies
Finish month banner
Food plates
Cake plates
silverware
Paper Straws
Cups
Small cups for dip and veggies/fruit
paper flowers
Pictures for invitations
Order Invitations
Send Invitations
Smash cake monogrammed shirt

Paint laundry room
Laundry room shelves
shelf behind couch
Bathroom prints
Frames for prints
Map prints
Frame for map prints

Holy crap I have A LOT of stuff to get done. I should be able to get a few thing checked off tomorrow like the fabric banner, monthly banner (I just have to pick up a few pictures and clothespins to finish), party supplies (dollar store), Birthday crown, and paper flowers (I have all of the tissue paper in my attic just waiting to be folded). Thankfully we will be heading to my mom's tomorrow to swim and hang out so she can play with Little Lady while I work on her crown. Wish me luck and some over to drink some wine with me if you get a chance because I am going to drinking a lot until this party is over.

We Are Family

It's picture time again! These aren't just any pictures though these will be Mckinley's 1 year pictures. I know I know she won't be a year by June 23, but I want a pretty picture on her birthday invitation and no one take a picture of my baby quite like Courtney Young (Facebook). Let me remind you how awesome she is.








This is what I am thinking we will wear for our family shot. I don't want to buy anything new and I really want Mckinley to wear the precious monogrammed romper her Nonni just gave her. I had way too much fun on Picasa putting this collage together and I am pretty happy with how it will all look together. My black dress may not be in any of the other outfits, but I am pretty limited with what I have in my wardrobe. I might try a jean outfit if I can find a top that goes with everything else. I am pretty happy with this for now.

Love


Sunday, June 17, 2012

Happy Father's Day

I don't think my dear sweet husband really likes me to write about him on this silly blog of mine, but today it is going to be all about him and 2 other amazing men in my life.

I first want to wish a Happy Father's Day to the father of my hubby. Carter Doyle you are just the sweetest silliest man I know and you can make my little girl laugh just by looking at her. I also want to thank you for creating the man that I married and making him such an amazing person (Don't worry Joan Doyle I know you had a hand in that too). Thank you so much for always running to our rescue especially at 2 a.m. when we needed that darn lock box. You love our little girl so much and we love you so much!





All I have to say is Whoomp There It Is!

Next is my Daddy. My sweet sweet daddy puts up with so much with all of us girls. We never made it easy for you, but we all made it out alive. I love when you just stop by to see Little Girl because she absolutely loves you! Even when she was going through her stranger danger she always wanted her Grandpa and not just because of your cool shirts. I know I could never repay you for everything you have done for me through out the years and no matter how much I screwed up you never ever gave up on me. You always gave me the motivation (your "Letter" it is hanging up on my refrigerator just in case I ever need a reminder) to get my stuff together. Thank you for always helping us fix things, tow things, build things, and for just putting up with me.







Now to the number one Dad this Father's Day. You may not be my daddy, but you are the most amazing daddy to our little. I still can't believe how lucky we are. I never in my wildest dreams thought I would meet a man like you and then trick you into marrying me. I can be quite the handful and this child we created together is quite the character too. I like to tell myself you think everyday when you wake up how lucky you are, but what you are probably really thinking is "what madness is going down today". You are the hardest working person I have ever met and I know that you work that hard for us. I thank God everyday that he sent me someone who can understand my wild hyperactive gibberish, puts up with my random thought processes, loves me no matter what I spill or break, and still thinks I am beautiful even when I am in my comfy pants and grey t-shirt. You are the most incredible daddy ever and you are pretty darn awesome at snapping some Best Bottoms. All I ever have to say is "I have an idea" and you  are always on board (except for my chickens). How in the world did 2 crazy girls get so lucky. I am so happy we have so many more Father's Days to celebrate together. I love you with all of my heart and I know a little blond hair blue eyed little lady who think you are pretty darn cool.































Happy Father's Day to the 3 Most Amazing Father's Ever!!